Becoming Her

Words & Photography
by Vanessa Kessler



I sat and watched you eat a quick snack before your father daughter dance. I watched as the soft afternoon light streamed in and kissed your maturing features. Wearing a dress which used to be too long but has suddenly crept up to just above your knee. I watched and I realized you are changing so much right before my eyes.

Some days I feel as though I'm running out of time and I feel a sense of urgency to become that better mom that I had planned to become years ago. The one with more patience and less demands.

Some days I feel as though I'm running out of time and I feel a sense of urgency to become that better mom that I had planned to become years ago. The one with more patience and less demands. The one who is more present and always available to answer all the questions inquiring minds want to know. The one who would drop everything in a heartbeat to sit and do a creative project with you just because you asked.

Somehow she hasn't surfaced yet. It's still just me. Less than perfect, tired and stretched too thin, but I promise I will keep trying. Tomorrow is another day, and I hope to become her a little more.