Custom Sizes

Words & Photography
by Marielle Elizabeth



Be still my heart, because oh how this stings to write.

I talk often about the strength in talking to a designer, asking for custom sizes tailored to fit your fabulous body, but if we're being deeply, soul-baringly honest, then I want to share this sinking feeling with you too. It announces itself every time I hopefully skim a brand's sizing chart. The lump in my throat as I swallow back the reality of being unfit to dress, or at least the resounding feeling that accompanies that disappointment. The flush of shame when I see a designer has seen my message, my request for a larger size and clicked away - silently.

There is a mighty swift current in the lake of self doubt that comes with being an outlier. There is the honest and brutal reality that 80% of the clothing I see and would love to wear is not made for my body. That my style, my wardrobe, my sense of self expression, is all too often held captive by an industry that sees my body as unworthy of dressing.

That my style, my wardrobe, my sense of self expression, is all too often held captive by an industry that sees my body as unworthy of dressing.

As the years pass, the more solidarity I find in others, opening up and sharing these struggles – the less the sting feels personal. So if as you look to update your wardrobe for Fall, your fingers softly strumming beautiful fabrics in a boutique that doesn’t carry clothing that bares resemblance to the sizes you need – you’re not alone. I’m right there with you.

It’s hard and it aches like a Jr. High heartbreak.
Receding with time, but never truly outgrown.