My Daughter To Keep

Words & Photography
by Megan Alexandra



To My Daughter:

When you entered our world, I was filled with indescribable awe and deep, deep gratitude. You were here. I got to keep you. You are mine. I held you in my arms and kept repeating over and over, “I can’t believe it. I just can’t believe it. I get to keep her.”

It took me weeks to wrap my mind around that fact. Before you, the babies I mothered were mine to love deeply, but not to keep. Entering motherhood first through the door of Foster Mothering followed by the door of Biological Mothering was a very unique experience. It taught me to grasp tightly to the fleeting moments, to be grateful for every day, and to memorize everything I possibly could about each child placed into my arms.

Before you, the babies I mothered were mine to love deeply, but not to keep. Entering motherhood first through the door of Foster Mothering followed by the door of Biological Mothering was a very unique experience.

But then, there you were. My daughter. What a tremendous, wonderful, indescribable gift. So, now, I grasp tightly to the fleeting moments as you grow. I am grateful for every day. I memorize everything about you. Because you’re growing so fast. My little Ivy. My daughter to keep.